RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 9 Review: Episode 5: Kardashian: The Musical (SPOILER FREE)

RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 9 Review: Episode 5: Kardashian: The Musical (SPOILER FREE)

As the girls return to the work room, after the unexpected-turned-expected elimination of Drag Race ‘dame’ Charlie Hides, the controversy of the queen’s lack of a fight was the main discussion – as it was online for the last week. It opens the truth again: it’s season 9 of Drag Race; queens should know they need to style, sew, and lip-synch if necessary.

I stated last episode that the season so far is too greatly different to how it was, whether that’s due to its move to VH1 or other forces, but this episode made me scream “FINALLY” in the first few minutes because guess what’s back?

“Who’s up for a mini-challenge?” and “oh, pit creeeeew!” Yes! It’s the first time in the whole season we have had a mini-challenge with quick drag, and the presence of everyone’s favourite helpers, the pit crew.

In true fashion, the winner of the mini-challenge is given a prize and the lead position for the main challenge. The episode title gives it away: we have a musical challenge, based around the lives of the (in)famous Kardashian/Jenner family, titled Kardashian: The Musical.

The winner assigns her and the others’ roles, and the roles include ‘momager’ Kris, the three Kardashians, the two Jenner sisters, famous stars Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan, “newest Kardashian” Blac Chyna, and the future North West.

This is where drama first arises; starting with Nina Bo’nina Brown (“the Third”), who fusses about the role she was assigned – this recurs a couple odd times, and I can hear the sighs – and secondly with Eureka, who opens during script reading about having a problem with her knee, to the point of needing crutches when walking. I watch and pray that a musical challenge won’t be too much for her, because despite her feud-prone comments, she is ferocious and fun.

Skip to stage rehearsals and the holes are showing – no surprise. Drama from a scene before returns, and the other queens are being affected; when you’re in the main roles of the challenge, what happens when you fail? You fail hard!

One queen with a season-long history of tripping up is struggling – again. It hurts to see this queen act awkwardly and scared, because if she continues that way without any signs of improvement, she will fall and she will go. No question.

Let’s go from drama to solving drama; last week, we all saw Eureka and Sasha butt heads about making jokes about eating disorders, and now Eureka is “having a day” where she wants to clear the air with Sasha, as well as Valentina. Her heart is placed on her sleeve and she apologises to the queen for taking the serious issue light-heartedly, which allowed Valentina to open up – such as she attempted to last week. As one queen stated, “this is RuPaul’s Best Friend Race!”

Let’s head to the main stage. Take your seat, switch on your phone and take a sexy selfie. It’s time for Kardashian: The Musical, as we watch alongside king of show-tunes Todrick Hall and singer Meghan Trainor.

The acting with some of these queens is so on-point, from the start and throughout, but others have those painfully obvious flaws. Just remember the number-one sin with a lip-synch challenge: you must have that tight lip-synch! I hate to say, but if you over-exaggerate that mouth, you’re going into the bottom two.

The queens that not only rock their roles, but stay in them throughout the entire show, are the ones who are standing out – I won’t say who, but you’ll know who.

Unlike last week’s runway, we have the time and the comments we always anticipate! The looks all have that speck of uniqueness (as Ru loves to see in her queens), with “faux fur realness”, and I am admiring most of these looks (maybe I’m biased with the colour green), but ultimately the outfits won’t save the untalented actors on the stage.

The winner, we all could see on that stage who was taking the win for this challenge – incredibly well deserved. I am having higher and higher hopes for this winning queen, and I can see her in the top 3 now, if I’m honest.

The bottom two, lip-synching to Meghan Trainor’s track “Woman Up”, were unfortunately predictable – even I was shouting “SHE’S IN THE BOTTOM! SHE’S IN THE BOTTOM!” But as it has been for most the season, within the first few beats of the song, we could see who was gonna be told to sashay away – but believe me, as obvious as it is, you’ll be gasping and gluing yourself to every moment the episode has left to offer. You might even shed a tear – I was close to.

This episode revived my faith in season 9. I’m sorry, RuPaul, but after last week’s episode I was left thinking “is Drag Race on the decline?” but now this episode has aired and the quality has 100% been dragged back up (no pun intended), I’m once more excited to see what the season has in store later on.

And remember, kitty girls: next week is the Snatch Game! Expect an extra extra long review next weekend because I will not be able to minimise the promising extravagance that is Snatch Game.

Til then.

Rating: 8/10

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